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Your Story |
Archie
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# Posted: 12 Feb 2008 07:29
Reply
I can't go on like this for ever. I am like many other carers in a situation that can not go on indefinitely. And I consider myself to be one of the lucky ones.
My story is this. I have been married 18 years this year, 3 teenagers at home and in school 16B, 15B & 13 G.
My wife has MS, and I have cared full time for her for last 4 years. She had to give up her work when MS was finally diagnosed, she got £2000 for 13 years service.
I had been self employed and running as successfull business employing 6 at its peak.
Our sole income is now made up of a cocktail of benefits CA, IB, IS, CTC, DLA We managed to keep our own home, small mortgage but only paying interest at the moment, we contribute £100 a month ourselves on top of of mortgage interest paid by DWP.
Our car is a motability car. I have got a taxi drivers licence plate & taxi operators. But you try getting a bank that will give you a car loan in my circumstances! I need to start earning soon we are living on the limits, everything is going up in cost, but benefits are not.
Its been hard very hard but like other carers we have no other choice but to carry on regardless. A lot of worries ahead, MS is progressive so more caring, I rarely get a good nights sleep, my caring roll is 24/7. Kids will be going into further education in next couple of years we are struggling financially as we are.
Social services are starting to help but we were in the wilderness for 3 years and a lot of suffering and hardship was endured in this period, I had to find them and self learn how to deal with them. The MS Society have been very supportive.
As you can see this situation can not go on as it is forever, the strain put on a family by caring is not right.
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Linda Mercury
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# Posted: 7 Sep 2010 16:41
Reply
first of all I feel bad that I have always assumed that people with children got much more help with any problems they had compared to older people like myself, age 57 but having had disabities since age 34 so a bit similar to your wife's in some ways.
i think your problem is horrendous, especially as your young lives are being ruined by the benefit system and probably even further because you have tried to support yourselves through your self employment.
on a positive note, i commend you for trying to carry on, albeit that is no consolation, but having butted in to several people's problems posted on this site tonight i would say exactly the same to you, contact your MP regarding what you are suffering benefits wise and how the latest changes will affect your life if they are reduced..... how much it will affect you financially with these rising prices of basic needs such as gas and electricity etc.
these MP's of whichever party, have no idea whatsover what it is to have to budget let alone when they increase VAT or withdraw day care facilities, need a small operation for something that really isn't that troublesome to the likes of your wife or myself etc.
they just claim the cost on expenses, or if they have to pay for it themselves, have plenty of money to do so in the first place thanks to us sheep, the taxpayer.
i urge you to put it in writing to your MP your grievances because if they get it in writing they have to reply, not always with any answers as such but it is brought to their awareness.
i have written to mine many times on various issues and whilst he maybe cannot do much, he knows there is a Constituent out here that won't let him be unaccountable for not doing the best for me, and hopefully others.
so final word to you is, put it in writing, vent your spleen regarding the situation and don't be afraid of informing your local press if things get too bad........
if you want to talk to someone then phone me on 01243-262884, preferably after midday........
Linda in West Sussex
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Linda Mercury
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# Posted: 7 Sep 2010 16:43
Reply
first of all I feel bad that I have always assumed that people with children got much more help with any problems they had compared to older people like myself, age 57 but having had disabities since age 34 so a bit similar to your wife's in some ways.
i think your problem is horrendous, especially as your young lives are being ruined by the benefit system and probably even further because you have tried to support yourselves through your self employment.
on a positive note, i commend you for trying to carry on, albeit that is no consolation, but having butted in to several people's problems posted on this site tonight i would say exactly the same to you, contact your MP regarding what you are suffering benefits wise and how the latest changes will affect your life if they are reduced..... how much it will affect you financially with these rising prices of basic needs such as gas and electricity etc.
these MP's of whichever party, have no idea whatsover what it is to have to budget let alone when they increase VAT or withdraw day care facilities, need a small operation for something that really isn't that troublesome to the likes of your wife or myself etc.
they just claim the cost on expenses, or if they have to pay for it themselves, have plenty of money to do so in the first place thanks to us sheep, the taxpayer.
i urge you to put it in writing to your MP your grievances because if they get it in writing they have to reply, not always with any answers as such but it is brought to their awareness.
i have written to mine many times on various issues and whilst he maybe cannot do much, he knows there is a Constituent out here that won't let him be unaccountable for not doing the best for me, and hopefully others.
so final word to you is, put it in writing, vent your spleen regarding the situation and don't be afraid of informing your local press if things get too bad........
if you want to talk to someone then phone me on 01243-262884, preferably after midday........
Linda in West Sussex
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